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mood: okay, stressed, somewhat sad.
So haven't been concentrating so much on my weight; school has been really fucking tough! Not to mention I am the lead in our school play The Medea! SO many lines to be learned!
Going to New York this summer for Drama <3 I must be skinny before I leave!
I cannot wait until this semester is over; I might be going to Middle College next semester :)
Boys are still getting me down, especially the ex Donny <|3 He cant decide if he wants me or not :(
Wishing everyone luck and a happy weekend.
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Boyfriend Broke up with me Monday. Fuck him.
Current weight : 120
I want to lose more <3
I want a life of high grades in school, sex, drugs, ajob with money, and good times.
I want to feel free.
I will make this happen for the sake of my sanity.
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|  Todays my birthday as well as the day my boyfriend is leaving to live in Oak Island Beach ( 3 hours away from me ) ....its going to be hard but I hope that we can make it through <33We were going to get matchin tattoos haha. A little heart on our fingers, the second to last bend before your fingernail ( if you can visualize that ) but we have to wait to get them now. He's an amazing tattoo artist! I really want him to do my peacock feather for me :)I went to the gym yesterday and the day before. Yesterday I just swam for about 30 minutes, just laps. The day before I did a lot of arm workouts on the machines a The Rush fitness center as well as this GREAT ab machine <3 I love it. I also havent been eating a lot. Though yesterday I did have to go to th ehospital because i woke up with bruises all over my body and I had no idea where they came from.When they were drawing blood, the lady had to stick me 5 times before she got any because I was so dehydrated and wasnt eating. She was a little upset with me but whatever. My whole body is sore hah and I just want things to go right for me now. I just want to stay happy for awhile without any interruptions. |
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|  things are a little bit better then my last post. I lost about 2 pounds but I need to work harder! I haven't been eating much, just naturally. I dont have time to eat really because of school and all the homework I have to do not to mention the lack of money for food. I've mostly been drinking liquids of all sorts to keep me "full".My boyfriend is moving 3 hours away from me :( Its been really stressful lately I guess I could say.Ive been taking these weight loss pills that are fucking huge -.- They're about as big as my pinky toe :/ but they're helping me a lot.Hope everyone is doing well and I hope to talk to some new people too :)PS: My birthday is this Wednesday, September 2nd! I'm finally turning 16, I'm actually excited about it.
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| My life is going back to how it used to be. I'm getting fat and gaining weight, I'm alone and I'm getting depressed. I honestly dont know what to do anymore.
I'm going to start working out tomorrow and taking weight-loss pills, I don't care if its not the best way to do it, I've done it before and I will do it again.
I'm sick and tired of being alone; all of my fucking "friends" ditch me for their boyfriends while I'm stuck by myself. My mom won't even let me hangout with a guy. And guys only want to fuck me :/.
While I was in California, I met the perfect guy; I never ever felt this loved by anyone before. He treated me like a queen and he told me that he wanted to be with me. :( I hate the fact that I live across the nation; i seem to have the worst luck with guys.
Blah I'm so sorry that I'm complaining but I dont know, I guess I just need to vent.
Right now I weigh 126. I want to get down to 117 or to a size 5 loose (i wear a size 5 tight)
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